Why did the chicken cross the road?

Why did the chicken cross the road?
SARAH PALIN:  The chicken crossed the road because
gosh-darn it,he's a maverick!

BARACK OBAMA:  The chicken crossed the road because
it was time for change!  The chicken wanted change!

JOHN MC CAIN:  My friends, that chicken crossed
the road because he recognized the need to engage
in cooperation and dialogue with all
the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON:  When I was First Lady, I
personally helped that little chicken to cross the
road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified
to ensure right from Day One that every chicken in this
country gets the chance it deserves to cross the
road. But then, this really isn't about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH:  We don't really care why the chicken
crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken
is on our side of the road, or The chicken is either
against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY:  Where's my gun?

COLIN POWELL:  Now to the left of the screen, you
can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken
crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON:  I did not cross the road with that chicken.

AL GORE:  I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY:  Although I voted to let the chicken
cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong
road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's
intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against
it.

AL SHARPTON:  Why are all the chickens white? We
need some black chickens.

DR. PHIL:  The problem we have here is that this chicken
won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on
this side of the road before it goes after the problem on
the other side of the road. What we need to
do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not
taking on his current
problems before adding new problems.

OPRAH:  Well, I understand that the chicken is having
problems,which is why he wants to cross this road so badly.
So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes
and take falls, which is a part of life,I'm going to give
this chicken a NEW CAR so that he can just drive across the road
and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER, CNN:  We have reason to believe there is a
chicken,but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the
other side of the road.

NANCY GRACE:  That chicken crossed the road because he's
guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN:  To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART:  No one called me to warn me which way that chicken
was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to
sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No
little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS:  Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a
toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not
been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY:  To die in the rain, alone.

GRANDPA:  In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed
the road.Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and
that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS:  Isn't that interesting? In a few moments,
we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time,
the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case
of molting, and went on to accomplish it's lifelong dream of
crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE:  It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON:  Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads
together, in peace.

BILL GATES:  I have just released eChicken2011, which will not only
cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents,
and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral
part of eChicken2011.
This new platform is much more stable and will never reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN:  Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the
road move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS:  Did I miss one? 

SCARY!!!: Warning on posting pics from your cell phone!!!!!!!

PLEASE PASS THIS INFO TO ANYONE YOU KNOW WHO TAKES PICTURES WITH THEIR CELL OR SMART PHONE AND POSTS THEM ON LINE.

I want every one of you to watch this and then be sure to share with all your family and friends. It's REALLY important info, about what posting things on your cell phones can do TO YOU!!! Too much technology out there these days so beware............. PLEASE TAKE THE TIME TO WATCH THIS VIDEO, AND TAKE THE RECOMMENDED PRECAUTIONS. If you have children or grandchildren you NEED to watch this.  It's scary!

Scary Stuff

Doggie Phone Service?

               PHONE REPAIR 

Lawrence, Kansas, December 12, 2008 
A Kansas farm wife called the local phone company to report her telephone failed to ring when her friends called - and that on the few occasions, when it did ring, her dog always moaned right before the phone rang. 

The telephone repairman proceeded to the scene, curious to see this psychic dog or senile lady. He climbed a telephone pole, hooked in his test set, and dialed the subscriber's house. 

The phone didn't ring right away, but then the dog moaned and the telephone began to ring. 

Climbing down from the pole, the telephone repairman found: 

1 . The dog was tied to the telephone system's ground wire with a steel chain and collar. 

2. The wire connection to the ground rod was loose. 

3. The dog was receiving 90 volts of signaling current when the number was called. 

4. After a couple of jolts, the dog would start moaning and then urinate.

5. The wet ground would complete the circuit, thus causing the phone to ring.

Which demonstrates that some problems CAN be fixed  by pissing and moaning.

Thought you'd like to know.

Somewhere in Italy an ESR gets tested, good video

The lack of safety equipment is a bit disturbing, but she looks like she is having fun.
Click the link to view, it is only a minute long.http://www.vimeo.com/29826947

So true, and right.